A scary bedtime story
to be read in a piratical voice with all relevant business
Comes a-crawling through the town
eyes is green and teeth is brown –
catch you, crunch you, gulp you down!
Name? The CATAWAMPUS
Finds the gap beneath your door,
keep those feet up off the floor,
if it sees them, you’re no more!
Dreadful CATAWAMPUS
Just when you assume it’s gorn,
think you sense the coming dawn,
makes you wish you’d not been born!
Awful CATAWAMPUS
See its horrid hoary arm,
twistin’ wrist and sweaty palm,
say a prayer and sing a psalm
’gainst the CATAWAMPUS
Reachin’ for you in your bed,
hoverin’ above your head
then it grabs your feet instead!
Vicious CATAWAMPUS
Now you feel its cold embrace,
now you touch its frightful face
clammy as a piece of plaice!
Shocking CATAWAMPUS
Clamps you in a grip so tight
almost you be dead of fright,
will it scratch or will it bite?
Snarling CATAWAMPUS
Then it switches off the light,
wishes you a peaceful night!
Did I scare you? It’s alright,
it’s NOT A
CATA-
WAMPUS
(You were lucky this time…)
Dictionary definition of Catawampus – “A fierce, imaginary animal”